Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Apa wa merepek ni?


Biar saja ada. yang ter jadi biar saja terjadi.

Sungguh abstrak dan universal. terlampau banyak maksud untuk di ungkaikan.

Hanya dengan cinta, semua emosi bisa bergabung menjadi satu.

Bila tiada, juga terasa. Menangis jua kerana cinta.

Usah beban, biar saja. Kerana manusia dilahirkan memang untuk merasakan cinta.

Ya cinta, cinta itu ada.

Pejamkan mata dan rasailah.

Terima kasih.

One foot on the ground.

So Life,

I breath everyday not realizing that the air that I inhale is shared with million others. In simple words, I have to struggle to stay alive and compete with others. Once I have both feet on the ground, stable, I thought that I’m doing ok. Well, its not OK. I have to constantly be alert because I just dont know whats going to happen in the future. Have u ever felt happy, sad, angry, anxious, betrayed, and other emotions that sometimes you yourself cant identify the reasons, and at the end of the day you just let your feelings. either stay or go. If yes, you are living in the right world. There are no such thing like the perfect world, perfect place, perfect partner..its all nonsense. The word perfect shouldn’t be invented in the first place. I keep on blaming and punished myself for not being the perfect person. Its wrong. I realize that I should be working on how to solve the problems and live with it. Because on top of all this, thats just how life works. So yes, thats life for me. and its like this.

Signed with one foot on the ground, yet living.


Sunday, October 31, 2010

Dear Mr. President

Dear Mr. President
Come take a walk with me
Let's pretend we're just two people and
You're not better than me
I'd like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly

What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep
What do you feel when you look in the mirror
Are you proud

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held high
Can you even look me in the eye
And tell me why

Dear Mr. President
Were you a lonely boy
Are you a lonely boy
Are you a lonely boy
Are you a lonely boy
How can you say
No child is left behind
We're not dumb and we're not blind
They're all sitting in your cells
While you pave the road to hell

What kind of father would take his own daughter's rights away
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You've come a long way from whiskey and cocaine

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held high
Can you even look me in the eye

Let me tell you bout hard work
Minimum wage with a baby on the way
Let me tell you bout hard work
Rebuilding your house after the bombs took them away
Let me tell you bout hard work
Building a bed out of a cardboard box
Let me tell you bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
You don't know nothin bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work

How do you sleep at night
How do you walk with your head held high
Dear Mr. President
You'd never take a walk with me
would u


Friday, October 8, 2010

just a lil piece to refresh your memory about CINTA.

just a lil piece to refresh your memory about CINTA.

What is CINTA? ‘Cinta adalah sesuatu yang abstract’- BM


It evolves around five modern-day love stories with the metropolitan skyline of Kuala Lumpur as the backdrop. While each story is independent, each character is connected to each other by circumstances, coincidence or location. With love as its universal theme, the musical takes us through the lives of five couples who search, find and lost their love in the beautiful city. Through them, we experience five different facets of love.

CINTA is about 10 strong characters and 5 beautiful experiences.

Di jalin indah menjadikan 1 cerita yang menarik.


Cinta Unggul - Rubiah & Dr Elyas

Sometimes action speaks louder than words

Love is blind. Perfect strangers fall in love. Common isn’t it? Tapi ada sesuatu yang istimewa tentang pasangan ini. They are an old couple who happens to meet and befriend. Walaupun Dr Elyas sakit, Rubiah masih sayang dan mengambil berat. Cinta antara mereka is very silent. Tidak pernah ada ungkapan CINTA walau sekali pun namun the feeling that grows between them is really pure. Through this couple you will understand and learn how heart whispered to each other, but actions shows them all. Tiada kata sayang, tapi kita dapat merasakan CINTA.

Cinta Rahsia- Azlan & Azura

Not everyone wants to show, but they do feel it

Biarlah rahsia, that’s the best to describe about these two young couple. A successful businessman fell in love with a normal typical girl who works in a bookstore. Mungkin ia juga agak cliché, tetapi their love story can make us understand that every so often, CINTA tidak dapat merubah cara pemikiran seseorang dalam sekelip mata. Kisah perbezaan darjat is infact pretty common, but the way love can move a person’s heart and mind is yet to be discovered through this couple’s true love.

Cinta Lela Manja Dyan & Dhani

Air dicincang pasti tidak akan putus

Dyan and Dhani are inseparable. Not because they are in love, but they love each other. They are siblings. Dyan seorang yang tegas tapi merasakan dirinya tewas da lam hidup. Dhani is a young boy who is very stubborn and always follows his heart to live his life. Conflict between them is so intense makes them fall apart. Namun CINTA itu bagaikan sakti, walaupun benci dan marah, kasih sayang di antara adik-beradik itu tidak dapat disangkal. Sacrifice is part of love; nothing can stop that when love is already in your blood.

Cinta Sepenuh Jiwa- Harris & Airin

If you force your heart to love, u will suffer

A sweet married loving couple who thought they are perfect for each other, which apparently they are not. Suami seorang yang naif dan terlalu cinta akan isterinya, but at the same time isterinya sudah tidak merasakan cinta itu. Adakah itu CINTA? Yes, it is love. Love is not about happy ending all the time, love can also be painful. It’s a price we have to take to know apa itu CINTA sebenarnya. This melancholy story will put us into silence and take a minute to think about love and life. Sad is not the ending when you know how to let go of CINTA yang sememangnya bukan milik kita.

Cinta Tulus – Khalif & Arianna

I don’t love her, I just pity her..oh no! wait..i’m in love with her

Khalif & Arianna is a total stranger. Initially, Khalif is just a help to Arianna, but it appears that Khalif had fall for her. They are very young to actually know what love is all about. The sweet part is they matured each others feelings when they’re together and that is CINTA for them. Loving and caring is the essential but yet very deceiving through their actions. Tetapi, cinta dalam hati tiada siapa yang tahu. Cinta antara mereka lebih relax, not that romantic but yet you can still feel the love.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010


some people just play it safe and make others look bad. is it good? i simply don't understand the relevance. kenapa? well, masing2 punya fikiran. i have nothing to say because i dont think its important. attitude do rules, but attitude can bring you down too. pendirian?penyakit?ego?masing2 punya cara. and this is one of the way. ntahlah.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

i wrote, stored and now publish it.

this was written in 2008- i just found my so called diary. and i dont mind sharing it. before i was lost, now im a totally different person. i'll write more about 'now' later.............

It’s been so so long since I last write anything. I KNOW!! It’s me to blame. I have been very very very damn BUSY! Working, Classes, Assignments, Tests, Meetings...and the list goes on. I felt bad for myself…dear me, punish me! There are so many things I missed out to share. Should I blurt it out or be selfish again and keep it to myself? In this missing period…there are so many things happened that made me realize that no matter how bad life is...still it goes on…ok maybe not. Some may have a detour…jumping off a building like that lil girl? What was she thinking anyway…whatever it is we have to be prepared to face anything that comes our way. Like me, it’s been almost 5 months now I put myself at RISK. But because I believe in myself…I survived. Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be this hard…coldplay once said. Enough crap. Reality check!!!

Saturday, July 10, 2010


It's precisely the disappointing stories, which have no proper ending and therefore no proper meaning, that sound true to life

Monday, May 31, 2010


Incompatible, it don't matter though'cos someone's bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do, You're not easy to find

Is it possible, Mr. Loveable
Is already in my life?
Right in front of me
Or maybe you're in disguise

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

Here we are again, circles never end
How do I find the perfect fit
There's enough for everyone
But I'm still waiting in line

Who doesn't long for someone to holdWho knows how to love you without being toldSomebody tell me why I'm on my ownIf there's a soulmate for everyone Who doesn't long for someone to holdWho knows how to love you without being toldSomebody tell me why I'm on my ownIf there's a soulmate for everyoneIf there's a soulmate for everyone

Most relationships seem so transitory
They're all ...

Sunday, May 2, 2010

kalau micheal jackson nyanyi lagu BAD, lu tepuk tangan kan..

its been so long. i was not busy,but lazy.

ada benda yang buat wa nak tulis blog today. nothing grand or big. its just how i feel and i just wanna express it. lu tak nak baca takpe.janji wa puas.

ok.where shall i start.generally, people like to talk about other people. common la tu kan. suka kondem org lain. bla.bla.bla.... orang-orang mcm ni memang banyak kat mukabumi kita ni..i bet u have met some along the way...for me, wa dah cam tak heran. wa plak memang jenis yang memang tak kisah.tak amik port langsung...tapi kan...if its too much, penyabar camne pun boleh meletup.

i dont like to pick a fight. but i love fighting. so today, i'll fight with my feelings and let it go here.

if u think ur perfect, why r u still like that?kesian.kesian.kesian. sumpah kesian.

i hate it when people yang tak sepatutnya decide untuk wa,nak memandai tell me what to do. sape lu to say that im bad or watsoever? and oh please define BAD? TAK BAIK? JAHAT? please,please,please??

selalu orang cakap, tak sedar diri, cermin la diri sendiri dulu...kan? tapi kalau cermin pun dah modified, ini lah jadinya. semua yang nampak di cermin perfect. and again, wa kesian.kesian nak mampus.

banyak benda jahat orang buat kita nampak, bila diri sendiri buat, rasa benda tu betul. BETUL ke tu?BAIK ke tu?entahla, wa tak berani nak jawab, sebab di mata orang, wa kan selalu SALAH!.

let me put this way, wa memang bengang..kalau betul apa yang mereka rasa itu BETUL dan BAIK...than im seriously freaking FAR from being BAD.

wa nak keluar minum jap. kalau rajin wa sambung. chow!

Friday, February 19, 2010

wa hilang bersebab...............

hmmm...its been quite long wa tak update blog wa nih kan...bukan apa, ini adalah disebabkan beberapa perkara berikut yang wa tak dapat nak elakkan :-

wa memang wa mmg tak ambik port langsung nak jenguk wa nye blog...

preparation for wedding yang macam ala-ala kabur lagi....baju still tak tempah, and others follow. yang dah settle pun kursus kahwin je....ok la tu kan?hihi....

terjebak dalam business yang wa rasa sangat menguntungkan....serious wehh....tak tipu!! (sempat gak nak promote nih....) , so basically when you talk about money, it will always comes first. so benda2 lain sangkut lu takpe....yang penting cari duit dulu...:) kalau sesape interested leh direct msg wa kat facebook or hp wa! hahaha....*ni nama dia asal boleh, tak kira memane pun nak promote!*

tunang wa punye workshop. ekceli,memang langsung takde kene mengena ngan wa, but wa ni mmg sayang sgt kat dia, dlm erti kata lain...busybody sebenarnya..! wa plak yang terlebih excited nak tolong dia organize benda ni.bukan apa...wa mmg takleh ah..naluri wa mmg cenderung sgt ke arah organize-organize event nih!! hahahahaha! in the end, wa plak yang lebih2 busy, sama naik, mengalahkan tuan punya workshhop tuh sendiri!! :)

kazen wa nak tunang. also takde la sangat sangkut paut ngan wa...but she's my auntie first daughter yang nak bertunang in the agak kelam kabut la jadinya...since wa la paling recent bertunang, kira cam fresh lagi la memory dalam kepala otak wa nih, wa la yang kena banyak bagi input. wa dgn kazen wa ni pun dah macam adik beradik so wa tade hal sangat!

sama ngan reason no 1.

sama ngan reason no 6.

so bila smua ketujuh-7 faktor ni dah hilang skit, leh la wa kembali aktif mengapdatekan blg wa k!


Tuesday, January 19, 2010

preparation level = 5%

i wanted to have a scrapbook for my wedding prep...but until now, buku pun tak beli, magazine pun ada dua tiga ketul je...tu pun dah bape kali hilang! :P mcm2 ive decided to start a blog...agak2 cam malas nak tulis, baru wa start main cut and paste for my scrapbook nanti....

i only have 5 months to pull everything off! kursus belum pegi...baju wa tak tempah gi, pelamin baru nak tetengok, doorgift tak order lagi....serious, ni bukan habuk pun takde...molekul2 kecik yang tak nampak ngan mata kasar pun tade!!!!!!uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

chill bebeh! chill!!wa slalu ingatkan diri wa suh cool......tapi bila dah jadi mcm ni, nak cool kejadahnya!!! ni dah horror weiii!

ok ok...hari ni wa rasa wa nak gi jejalan..nak tengok bebarang hantaran...yelaa..beli sikit2..lama2 jadi bukit! wa nak siap now!

my dream wedding would be boho forest wedding....theme nak gegempak...tapi usaha kureng! hahahahaaaaaiiiihhhhh!

Monday, January 18, 2010

minah gatal yang telefonnya tak berfungsi diwaktu siang!

wa panas! sakit hati ! sedih! semua ada...nak kata wa ni jeles gegila takde ah...tapi i think she's too much!! melampau..! kang wa panggil dia bitch...terasa...japg org kata wa plak jahat..tapi kalau dah perangai cam tuh....what else can i call her... .an angel in disguise??

wa bukan apa..dah few times benda ni jadi..., kononnya tunang wa je la dahan dia nak mengadu nasib....ptuiii!!!! kalau ye pun ada la cam siang2 ke...pepetang tak...memalam bute..kul 2,3,4,5 pagi pun nak ganggu hidup orang lain...wa cam bengang gak ah! memula wa cam rasa tak best...wa pun dah suh tunang wa sound dia...kalau nak cakap sgt, jgn la call time2 yang memusykilkan....kalau betul urgent sangat, cakap je tak, 'u ngan farra ke?takpelah...i call u baack!' yang ni lagi takleh pukul 5 pagi pastu cakap...'eeh..sorry i mengigau la'...memula nak gelak pun ada...apa nye lawak kampung minah ni nak buat!! ntah apa2 punye mentaliti...wa nak tuduh dia bukan2 pun..wa bukan kenal sgt...tapi wa cam buat conclusion sendiri ah..dia ni memang perempuan tak paham bahasa and otak kampung!!

wa cam nak buat something je....i've already told my tunang...kalau minah kampung tu lelebih...wa tanpa segan silu je akan sound tepet! wa tak peduli...wa dah kasi muka..minah tu nak kawan ngan tunang wa...,wa sikit pun tak heran..,tapi minah tak sedar diri ni cam lelebih ah plak!

at first i thought i just wanna stay cool, lek lek je la....but i dont want to feel insecure and i dont want to have this syak wasangka feelings towards him...satu benda yang sangat tak best wa rasa...wa nak relationship wa smooth je...wa heran ah...kenapa ada manusia mcm ni?? for me la kan..bila dah jadi mcm ni...senang je, kalau dah tak paham bahasa sangat...wa terpaksa ah cakap the same languange as minah tu...just nak sedarkan minah tu! i just hope she's prepared for me..sbb wa sendiri pun cam horror dengan diri wa bila wa dah start benci orang......

so to you miss halina, good luck! there will be no talian hayat, definitely no a,b,c,d choice, no nothing. just be prepared to roll your bag out of my life! sayonara bitch!


Saturday, January 16, 2010

a note to them

wa termenung jap...kenapa wa rasa terguris sangat? besar sangat ke salah wa?memang la besar...tapi takde ruang untuk wa perbaiki ke? kadang2 wa rasa.....kenapa bila wa je buat salah...wa akan rasa hina sgt.......or maybe i am just too emotional?? touching lebihh??!! or maybe i am the type that never gonna make ppl feel that way...sbb tu wa expect the same..tapi wa kena terima hakikat..we are living in this world with different dna's breathing the same air..

apa pun..deep down..selama wa hidup ni..memang banyak salah dah wa buat...banyak penyesalan dah dalam hidup wa...tapi wa ni manusia biasa...wa mmg admit that i'm far far far bepuluh ribu batu jauhnya from being perfect...tapi everyday i live...i always want to make sure that i am a better person....even sometimes wa cam frust menonggeng sebab wa tahu wa dah upsetkan ramai orang....tapi wa bangun balik and cuba lagi...just wa harap orang2 yang wa sakitkan hati, wa pernah buat salah...boleh bagi peluang kat wa sama mcm wa bagi peluang kat diri wa sendiri...

to my parents especially, wa tahu diorang mmg frust dengan wa...dari dulu lagi....dalam hati wa cam sedih gila sbb diorang tak pernah fail untuk bagi peluang kat wa....wa mmg thankful sesangat..wa harap wa dapat happykan diorg satu hari nanti...insyaallah....

to my other half, wa bersyukur sebab wa dapat orang yang sayang wa sangat2....yang boleh terima diri wa glad that i met u cause u really changed my life..thank u sgt sbb slalu ada ngan wa...

to my self, please be strong..

15.01.10 - The day i met the hotter babe! loving every inch of her....she's gorgeous...she's just perfectly BOLD and BEAUTIFUL!!!! However, today i had made some stupid mistakes that i chose to do it..i really hate myself!

so sad to feel lost especially when u really need to know where u are... and its a disaster to know that no one is reachable, even the ones you love.

my fault, my mess, my loss.

yes, i promised and yes, i break it. im not perfect, but i have changed. sometimes i felt sorry for myself. i just cant do anything right....i always disappoint ppl around me and it sucks.

- breakdown-

Friday, January 8, 2010

05.01.10 - The day she went away...

Today is the day i lost my blackberry phone. i just need to put it here so that i can remember....sad sad sad.....hope that i'll get hooked with another hotter bb soon....still searching for the perfect one for me tho.hurmmm....BOLD maybe..?